My nigga @michelstarkcan rocking that @sluurp_sa heat! #CheMeSLUURPdaarso word to my nigga @lelemrsolodolo

My nigga @michelstarkcan rocking that @sluurp_sa heat! #CheMeSLUURPdaarso word to my nigga @lelemrsolodolo

I feel like

Struu story I wish my rents would just divorce. It sucks to see u leave around 9 pm just to do mom dirty and I hate those fights u guys have: room locked and mom screaming at u, or that somber mode u always in around the crib, I’m your own son but u feel dead to me!
Wuddup dad I just called to say I need cash! Truth be told I’ll probably spend most of of it on drinks and a blunt, I don’t feel like I can function(be happy) when I’m not sober, talking to u sorta feels like the time Tshepo just went cold turkey.. All these texts and still no reply? All in all man I can’t blame her, I’m mad fucked up sometimes and I get what Khanyi was saying how could u want to be with someone that could write such. I’m a positive pessimist, was that an oxymoron, or should I stay on my schoolboy? And learn something, I wake up everyday to attend classes on shit that I really hate, I must be a moron cause it’s moronic to do some shit I really hate, just to please them. But who’s them cause really it’s just me in this room contemplating taking some pills and never waking up again,or a tub full of bloody water with another 21 year old’s wrists bleeding out: this is that shit that got me labeled as a weirdo and made u girls miss out on a great guy. Now the trust is gone and I’m yelling out ‘fuck bitches rather money’ drunk as shit, getting my shmoney on, the name’s ATM and I plan on racking out like one. My homie told me he blew 70 in one night about a week ago, and he’s good for about 10 tonight. It’s about to be a goodnight, I said no thou, cause the way I feel I might be in a fight and I’m definitely in a ruck my thoughts already. I hope my wife ain’t a thot, that’s a someday chat thou: I’m defos still drafting my prenup, cause all these girls do is turn up and I’m tryna see growth but that’s only happening below ur weave, and that’s an issue, but I need u boo so don’t leave and I won’t do ur dirty. I haven’t showered today but I smell nice. I hope this shit brings tears to u, so I could cry vicariously. About 21 stacks worth of my shit was stolen from me on Friday. That still feels like yday, anyway that shit saddened me, cause I know my mom’s gonna buy all that shit back, she didn’t deserve that. There’s a lot of shit I feel I could never tell anyone: does that mean I live in fear? There’s times I feel I should be convicted of murder. Up to this point I’ve killed myself a few times; reinvention is key. They say change is constant( woooooorrrrrddd) man I realized I couldn’t fuck with many of y’all. Ugly boy, rich gent… In terms of my person, I feel like we might just have a good thing, I might not say I love you but that’s only cause I’ve never been about lying to u. I’m trying to man up, so I could show u things, help you grow up, so u’ll never settle for less than me till marriage and that’s even when the ‘D’ in gooD is all caps. I’ve always said sex alone can’t make you happy, I say this with the deepest desires of eating you out, your thigh squeezing my head and shit, rolling with me will get u ahead and shit. Ignite the cracker and after the bang I might be dead and shit. I wish I was the go-with-the-flow type. Maybe then my mind would be better and shit. Rest in peace ntate Edgar Ntloko, grandad I hope u can see that I’m trying. Eyo Simmy, hope u seeing me do better, still sorta sucks going to PTA cause mate,you should be here, sharing blunts under the sun, with your Goddess-like smile, like the last time I saw you before your departure. Airport level, I’m floating over restricted airspace, I’m getting mad face, still live in the same place. I feel like I might not see 30 thou, I hope y’all forgive me when I pass, I feel like failing has never been my thing…

The bench playa’s cry

So there we are curled up on ur black couch in your white apartment in Sandton, conversation going something like ” I’m sorry bout ur car but atleast u my sweet ‘sister’ ” you hate it when I call u miss popularity but all that expensive clothing and range rove evoque made the world take a look. All these niggas quick to get u drunk and have fun times with u, now u calling em your friends when u would definitely diss em about a few months ago. Even u know all they wanna to fuck and be out? I guess it’s the lifestyle u choose to be about, and now I’m the dude u call to pick up the pieces when u down and out. It’s all good thou, I’ll play my position and be a bench player, waiting for the day u stop tryna be a playa. I’m glad u safe thou, hugging you while u use this shirt as a tissue. All these tears and we can still laugh about our fears…I remember New Year’s Eve Cape Town 2011, the day we met. Within pre-groove at your father’s penthouse, sorta felt like my initiation into the life. You said ‘hi my name is Mandy and I feel like your been rude’ we proceeded to chat, I was under mad gwababa with the same desires that I have right now everytime I touch you. So close yet so far from been that guy you want. I remember telling u I’m mad anxious and u pulled me in, you stole your New Years kiss from me as the sky lit up, for a second I forgot about the noise. Some how I still ended up at home mad as shit that night, I caught a fright from how fucked up this life can be. I was about 5 seconds from pronouncing my love before u hit me with a ‘that was fun’ and proceeded to go fuck your man. I found u on twitter in jan and had you crying to be my bestie in March. I care far too deeply to ever fuck that up. But u got to understand that I need to go now, and I ain’t leaving u but things won’t be the same now. I’m not the same as 2 years back and u ain’t too. But I can’t keep acting like I’m all good like this when I ain’t. Babe u got to see it, like my 4-5 I’m a dick. It’s been like 4-5 months since this shit click. Ain’t saying u got to pick but I ain’t gonna act there ain’t a trick, to you. Been about you now I’m about me, I been screwed over a couple times, nearly capsized like titanic at sea. Now a days feels like hot drunk women is all I see, I fail to take advantage cause of morals and shit, I’m out to change perceptions and avoid been walked all over and shit, to fall in the pit of love is a pity. You never know when one will escape, especially in this city. The lights too strong, rather shy in to darkness. so when I only give u a piece of my heart, I hope it’ll do, but if it ain’t man I hope that u ain’t quick to go…

So I been getting nominated for this 20 question thing. Let me not be a boring fart. 
1.my name is Atoh Tshepo Mothibe but everyone calls me ATM(I wonder why)
2. I got mad siblings
3. My gwababa game is too strong
4. Just turned 21 
5. I attend the Uuuj studying accounting 
6. I love my mother 
7. I got a pretty dumb phobia which I won’t expose hierso 
8. I think @_vuyi__ is quite dope
9. You can mostly find me chatting dumb ish with @michelstarkcan 
10. It’s my other brother @sir_cutane’s birthday today(say happy birthday yo) 
11. I got a bunch of people I consider family and I got love from them all 
12. Theresaliononmyback.tumblr.com that’s where I put my faux writing skills to some use
13. I go to sleep plotting world domination every night 
14. I been single for close to 3 years 
15. It’s been a great 3 years 
16. No really it has yo 
17. King of fomo
18. I actually look forward to being a dad 
19. That day ain’t coming soon thou 
20. I just wanna be a kid, you my nigga if you get that and fuck with me still. 
#morning

So I been getting nominated for this 20 question thing. Let me not be a boring fart.
1.my name is Atoh Tshepo Mothibe but everyone calls me ATM(I wonder why)
2. I got mad siblings
3. My gwababa game is too strong
4. Just turned 21 
5. I attend the Uuuj studying accounting
6. I love my mother
7. I got a pretty dumb phobia which I won’t expose hierso
8. I think @_vuyi__ is quite dope
9. You can mostly find me chatting dumb ish with @michelstarkcan
10. It’s my other brother @sir_cutane’s birthday today(say happy birthday yo)
11. I got a bunch of people I consider family and I got love from them all
12. Theresaliononmyback.tumblr.com that’s where I put my faux writing skills to some use
13. I go to sleep plotting world domination every night
14. I been single for close to 3 years
15. It’s been a great 3 years
16. No really it has yo
17. King of fomo
18. I actually look forward to being a dad
19. That day ain’t coming soon thou
20. I just wanna be a kid, you my nigga if you get that and fuck with me still.
#morning

Tags: morning

These socks😭 I need more #OFWGKTA

These socks😭 I need more #OFWGKTA

Tags: ofwgkta

A big part of the reasons a man had to grow up, it’s been sooo weird watching you grow up. Just know I have the realest love for u. Forever my baby sister, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! #nynigga #fam #funtimesahead

A big part of the reasons a man had to grow up, it’s been sooo weird watching you grow up. Just know I have the realest love for u. Forever my baby sister, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! #nynigga #fam #funtimesahead

Ghostly

Ghostly

I won’t lie she had just curved being miss.Paati before we took this picture… So cold Ziyanda, so cold. Lol kidding. Thanks bum #ATMs12thBirthdayPaati

I won’t lie she had just curved being miss.Paati before we took this picture… So cold Ziyanda, so cold. Lol kidding. Thanks bum #ATMs12thBirthdayPaati

Love me too?

I haven’t had sex in a while and really only person I have to blame is myself. See thing is I think I’ve overthunk it. Fuck it, I take more vodka to the head to kill all doubts and fears no time for tears except for the day I turned 21. August the 9th around 10 o’clock, I sat in that church seat sobbing all by myself, see I had to lay my grandpa to rest and it was extra sore cause the same flame that claimed he’s life claimed the house I grew up to call a home away from home. All those December holidays in the trap at granma’s house, I always had my hands over my ears cause em firecrackers got loud, and we would sit there and talk about life in detail. Grandpa taught me many things, I thought u would be here to see me graduate. Your first grand child to do and do it right. Talking bout school I’m failing dismally and honestly it’s cause I don’t wanna do this anymore, so I spend my time doing all the wrong shit, smoking and drinking and chasing women who’s affections were never meant for my blood. From the other side of train tracks, recently upgraded, straight up black new money with old money tendencies, everyone pushing a Beemer except the kids. All in all it’s been a real month, besides death and failure we had celebration of life and all that’s good about it. I been tryna cut down on the putch and the ciggies, truth be told the situation with my heart has been getting a bit scary. Didn’t think the party would be such a success, nothing was coming together and I had lost hope, but I kept pushing and the day finally came: shit was awesome, girl I think u would loved been there, it’s a shame I can’t even tell u bout it. How did things go so wrong that we can’t even talk no more, I know you care cause ur friends still tell me that u ask about me. U ain’t got to say it just know that I miss you too. I been getting into clashes with everyone, fucked up thing is that I’m always saying sorry like started it, told my older brother shit and showed no remorse. I can be a pretty cold dude when my anger’s up hence why I avoid that shit. U should enjoy playful and dumb me. The genius side is a bit fucked up, hence all this dank in my bag. I need something to control the darkness. Fuck it I need some prayer thou, and something to help me to get over all this doubt in my mind. But ey man we made it here, failed suicide attempts,car crashes and heart attacks couldn’t keep me down, tussles with depression and anxiety come and go and I still manage to dress up, go out and fucking do best, walking around jhb phone in hand listening to all my favorite tunes while the girls I like, ride around in my acquaintances fresh whips and I still ain’t phased cause I know they love my company. It’s all good baby baby, my come up is up coming and I just wanna say thank u to everyone that’s been a part of this, to the team(y’all my brothers man) let’s get this cheese then all get married and live in one estate so our kids grow up as friends. Let us travel the world and get our dreams and live obscenely, let our presence be felt the world over, and never give up hope on true love and happiness all the shit the we find gay right now. I hope everyone I’m friends with knows I got their back and share a general love for y’all. Now love me too

#ATMs12thBirthdayHeat

#ATMs12thBirthdayShandis

#ATMs21stBirthdayHeat

#ATMs21stBirthdayPaati

#ATMs21stBirthdayParty 

Me and my bestie @liasophiac_93 at her 21st! Love you bum, hope u enjoyed it hun. P.S I’m sorry

Me and my bestie @liasophiac_93 at her 21st! Love you bum, hope u enjoyed it hun. P.S I’m sorry